Chloe's Present
by MobBob
Summary: Chloe asks Amy to help her find a Christmas present for Beca.
1. Chapter 1

Amy knocked on Chloe's door. "Hey bitch, you wanted to talk to me."

"Yes," said Chloe as she opened the door. "Come in."

"Just to let you know, I'm not into girls," said Amy.

"Excuse me?" said Chloe.

"Isn't that why you invited me here? I saw you trying to sneak a peak at all this." Amy pointed to her body.

"No," said Chloe. "Not that don't have a lovely figure."

"Don't insult me," said Amy. "So why did you want me here?"

Chloe bit her lip. "I want to get Beca a present for Christmas. You know, since we're good friends."

"I see," said Amy. "So how long have you been doing it?"

"What?" Chloe gave Amy a piercing look. "Who said I was sleeping with Beca?"

"No one," said Amy. "Actually no, I think it was Jessica. Yeah, Jessica was telling everyone you two were hooking up."

"Anyways, do you have any idea what I should get Beca for Christmas?" said Chloe.

"I dunno." Amy proceeded to walk out the door.

"Where are you going?" said Chloe. "I thought you were going to help me?"

"I did," said Amy. "You asked me a question and I answered."

"Can you be actually helpful?" said Chloe.

"Alright." Amy got back into Chloe's room.

"Okay, so I was thinking about getting her some movies," said Chloe.

"She doesn't like movies," said Amy.

"I know," said Chloe. "But I figured I could get her to change her mind about movies."

"I bet that's not the only thing you want to change her mind about," said Amy.

"What are you talking about?" Chloe raised her eyebrow.

"Never mind," said Amy. "What movie do you want to get her?"

"I don't know," said Chloe. "She says she liked _The Breakfast Club_. Maybe I could get her that."

"Does she already own it?" said Amy.

"Yeah, that's a good question," said Chloe. "How are we gonna find out?"

"Easy." Amy pulled out her phone and began texting. "Hay B, U Own The B Club."

A while later Beca responded. "What'd she say?" said Chloe.

"She wants to know what I just sent her." Amy re-wrote her text so it was legible. "How about this: 'Hey bitch, U gots Da B Club'?"

"How about I write the text?" said Chloe. "Beca do you have _The Breakfast Club_."

Beca finally responded to Chloe's text. "No I don't."

"Okay," said Chloe. "Thanks Amy. I can get her _The Breakfast Club_."

"What 'I'?" said Amy. "I thought this present was gonna be from both of us? It was my idea to get her _The Breakfast Club_."

"No it wasn't," said Chloe as she reached for her car keys.

"Yes it was," said Amy. "I should at least get to my name on the tag."

"Why does it matter to you anyway?" said Chloe. "It's not like Beca's getting you a present."

"Exactly," said Amy. "I want that bitch to feel sorry that she didn't get me a gift for Christmas."

"Fine," said Chloe. "I'll put your name on the tag if you come with me to the store and help me find that movie."

"Okay," said Amy. "Can I control the radio then?"

"Don't push it," said Chloe.


	2. Chapter 2

Chloe and Amy walked up to a store clerk. He was preoccupied with a game of Temple Run and Chloe had to poke him a few times before he would listen. "Hey, where do you keep the DVDs?"

"Right there." The clerk pointed to a bargain bin.

"Yeah, we looked there," said Amy. "We're looking for good movies."

"Sorry, we don't carry good movies." The clerk looked back at his game.

"Okay," said Chloe. "Do you know where I can find some good movies?"

"Try Netflix," said the clerk.

"You don't understand," said Chloe. "I want to get _The Breakfast Club_ as a Christmas present for a friend."

"Oh," said the clerk. "Well why don't you get your friend Netflix."

"What?" said Chloe.

The clerk looked up from his game. "Yeah, set up an account for your friend and call it a Christmas present."

"That sounds really cheap," said Chloe.

Amy shrugged. "I think it's a good idea. Just remember to put my name on it."

"I'm not getting Beca Netflix," said Chloe.

"Why not?" said Amy. "You're just making things harder for yourself."

"I wanna get her something that's heartfelt, you know," said Chloe.

Amy rolled her eyes. "Fine, why don't you just get _The Breakfast Club_ from Amazon?"

"Huh, that's actually a good idea," said Chloe. "Why didn't you say that sooner?"

"Uhhh," said Amy. "Well, then we wouldn't get to have some girl time."

"You spent the whole time texting," said Chloe.

"No I didn't," said Amy. "I was playing Angry Birds."

* * *

So Chloe ordered _The Breakfast Club_ on Amazon, and the day before Christmas she got a package in the mail. Amy was there, making sure to remind Chloe to put her name on the present. "I just want to see the look on her face when she sees my name on the package."

"Fine." Chloe opened the package. "I'll send you a picture."

Chloe frowned once she saw the DVD case. "What's wrong?" said Amy.

"This isn't what I ordered." Chloe handed Amy the DVD.

"Yes it is." Amy picked up the DVD. "Wait, you're right. It has those Xs after the title."

"Yeah," said Chloe.

"Well what's wrong with this?" said Amy.

"Excuse me?" said Chloe.

"Yeah, who doesn't want porn for Christmas?" said Amy.

"Are you serious?" said Chloe.

"Of course not." Amy turned red and pretended to drop her phone.

"I just don't know what to do," said Chloe. "I can't give her this and it's too late to get her a real present. Any ideas?"

"None at all," said Amy.

"Thanks," said Chloe sarcastically.

"You're welcome," said Amy.


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: Merry Christmas guys. You've been awesome.**

Beca didn't know what to expect when Chloe invited her over. She suspected that Chloe wanted to give her a Christmas present. Beca of course didn't have a gift for Chloe and was forced to find something on the spot. She hastily put a pair of flip-flops in a box and wrapped it in some festive paper. By the time Beca got to Chloe's room, her hands were clammy. She knew her gift was not going to be anywhere near as good as Chloe's. After what felt like an eternity, Beca reluctantly knocked on Chloe's door.

"It's unlocked," said Chloe.

Beca opened the door. "Hey Chloe. I got you a present, you know with it being..."

Beca dropped her present. Chloe was sprawled out on her couch, wearing nothing but a strategically placed bow. "Merry Christmas."

"Oh my god!" Beca raised her hand to cover her eyes. "What are you doing?"

"I don't know," said Chloe. "I wanted to get you something special for Christmas and it was either this or porn."

"You were going to get me porn?" said Beca.

"It was Amy's idea." Chloe peeled a gift tag off her butt. "By the way, this is technically from both of us."

"Did you hear how that sounded in your head?" said Beca.

"Yeah, that was the best wording I could think of." Chloe got up from the couch. "Look, you've seen me naked before. You don't need to cover your eyes."

"I'm sorry, but I'd be a lot more comfortable if you put on some clothes," said Beca. "Not that you don't have a slamming body."

"Thanks." Chloe found a bathrobe.

Beca took her hands away from her eyes. "So, I got you some flip-flops."

"Oh man," said Chloe. "I wanted to be surprised."

"If I knew what you were getting me, I would've gotten you something else," said Beca. "Maybe a pair of hookers."

"That's actually not a bad idea," said Chloe.

Beca picked her present up from the ground. "Okay this is reaching a new level of weird."

"I'm sorry," said Chloe. "This did not go how I had expected."

"How did you think things were going to go?" said Beca.

"Not like this." Chloe bit her lip. "Look, I was gonna get you _The Breakfast Club_ for Christmas, but there was a mix up with Amazon and I didn't really have the time to think of anything else."

"I see," said Beca. "So you thought I'd want to see your junk for Christmas?"

"I didn't have that much time," said Chloe. "I was thinking that...well maybe you would...I said I was-"

"Chloe, it's fine," said Beca. "You don't need to apologize."

"I don't?" said Chloe.

"You were trying to get me something special," said Beca. "It's just things didn't go how you'd wanted. Plus, this is a better present than the one Jesse got me."

"Really?" said Chloe. "What'd he get you?"

"That's not important," said Beca. "Your present is better."

"How so?" said Chloe.

"Well, no one's given me a gift like this." Beca chuckled a bit. "And it's a nice story to tell the kids."

Chloe perked up. "You want to have kids?"

"Eventually," said Beca.

"What are you gonna name them?" said Chloe. "I always thought Ryan was a good name, and maybe Aubrey if it's a-"

"This just got awkward again," said Beca.

"Okay, sorry," said Chloe.

"Here." Beca handed her present to Chloe. "Let's get back to opening presents."

Chloe made a mock show of shaking the box. "I wonder what it could be. Is it a pair of flip-flops?"

"Come on," said Beca. "Just open it."

Chloe hugged Beca. "Merry Christmas."


	4. Epilogue

Beca looked at the DVD Chloe had bought her. "So, how'd you end up getting me porn for Christmas again?"

"It had the same title as the original and I didn't see the XXX part," said Chloe. "Don't porn movies usually have titles that are puns on the original?"

"I guess so," said Beca. "There's 'Star Whores', 'Womb Raider', 'American Booty'. Yeah, but what would you call a porn version of 'The Breakfast Club'?"

"Ooh, that's a fun question," said Chloe. "The Come First Club?"

"I could see that," said Beca.

"So what do you think happens?" said Chloe. "In the porno I mean."

"I don't know," said Beca. "Maybe Mr. Vernon agrees to let the kids out, but only if they do him some...ahem...favors."

"That sounds interesting," said Chloe. "Or maybe he leaves and the kids have a huge orgy. And maybe he comes back and joins in."

"Now I kinda want to watch it," said Beca. "You know, to see what happens."

"Yeah, same here," said Chloe.

Beca opened the case and put the disc into her DVD player. "Hey, is this normal?"

"Watching porn?" said Chloe. "I'm pretty sure everybody does this."

"No, I know that," said Beca. "It's just, do friends usually watch porn together?"

"I can't speak for everyone, but I've watched porn with Aubrey on occasion," said Chloe.

"Wait seriously?" said Beca. "What's she into?"

"A lot of weird stuff." The DVD menu and Chloe picked up the remote. "So do you wanna watch this?"

"Of course," said Beca.

"Good," said Chloe. "So how much do you wanna bet there's gonna be a huge orgy?"

"Twenty bucks says Mr. Vernon lets the kids out of detention if they service him," said Beca.

"Well let's see who gets the money." Chloe took the remote and pressed play.


End file.
